Thursday, August 19, 2010

Fucking Cereal In Milk How Does It Work

I am simply a home-schooled
14 year old Christian girl
I had a co-worker
who would giggle uncontrollably
if you walked up to him and just said,

my dear

the witch said I cannot help you
She paused
adjusted her hat
and turned to leave
We must not anger the Juggalos

Saturday, August 14, 2010

Jack London's Famous Short Story

Every human being
On this earth had been dreaming
Has been dreaming
And will continue to dream

There are many men
Who want to be able to shoot
Their cum just because
They view it as something
That is very manly
And they want to be able to
Do it too

Increase Ejaculate
Up to five times
With horny hands
When it comes to giving
By man prick on love date
Gets their face
Splashed with man goo
It becomes ugly
And inaccurate
Because our thoughts are
Bottom dying metaphors
Pretentious diction
Meaningless words
Six rules p.s.

For Baltimore we were
Pretty extreme taking
The high road
With Derrida

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

It Was A Little Bit Deeper Than That It Was Personal

Anytime one of the members
Started to lose interest she
Pretty much spit on your secret hole
I’m pro substance and style
It just hasn’t and probably can’t
Suck the life out of literature
As a melodramatic sissy
And Stein as a celebrity-sucking
Charlatan the Blavatsky of letters

Yeah I have to have
A breather foot going back
Full time to an ashtanga studio
I'll save money when I'm dead

How could Fast Times at Ridgemont High
Ever happen in a world like this?
That you said you couldn't remember
The last time you'd wished
A celebrity would go hiking in Iran
You know what's funny
No matter what

People argue in the commentary field
It's really quite ridiculous
Merry Christmas fucktards

Friday, August 06, 2010

The Atomic Bomb is Not Moby-Dick

Even when you're terrified
That said bomb is going
To fuck you in the ass
The Pynchon of Gravity's Rainbow
Is terrified of being fucked
If you are a young American
And you're bored
How about making a bomb
In your mom's kitchen
Like a franchise of McDonald's
Or my childhood favorite Carvel
These al-Qaeda cells
Are locally owned and operated
Spock would never betray
The emotion of discomfort
Or any other emotion
for that matter
I was in a car accident
A few years ago and it left me
With no teeth so
I now wear dentures
At first I thought it was
A horrible thing but like
They say every cloud
Has a silver lining
And the pleasure I can now
Share with the men of the world
Is my silver lining
I'm 6 ft. tall
Weigh about 240lbs
With long curly dark
Hair and blue eyes
If your one of those guys who's
Always wanted to try a gummer
But didn't want someones Grandmother
Doing it for you then I'm you girl
The next night we ate whale
Which he likes to repeat for long stretches
At public readings
His record is seven minutes
Isn't that what Paris Hilton does
Rack up points
Produce nothing of value
All these self indulgent a-holes
make me hope Mexico
Annexes this stupid country
Everything that even hints
At some nobility of spirit
I’ve learned from these creatures
I do love the way you put
Your words together in this story
I will try to comment
Tonight when we get to a motel
Hey I'm the curvy girl from metaquotes
who is extremely supportive
of your fashion goals
Friending you now
I went from being
School teacher of 8 years
To a cam girl
Also three paragraphs up from the bottom
Yes I suggested his observations are akin
To today’s surveillance techniques
Twitter & FB
Emma Watson’s vagina
looks the same as it did
before she cut her hair
I’m just sayin

If you want to view
Any of these things let me know
PayPal will keep my money

Thursday, August 05, 2010

Welcome To The Official Facebook Page

About smoking hot
Fierce fabulous and can
Spend money booze
It up and party
With the best of them
Lust is easy
For me love
Is hard which means
Either she's just
The best thing
Goin' in town
Which is possible
Or he's just naturally
Got a lot screamin'
In him when he gets
A movin I also think
That men need to
Be penetrated

Also kids
Are fairly unimaginative
Where did the women folk
Get the idea that writing
About their lives
Might be interesting

I work in
Children’s book publishing
So maybe that makes
Me qualified to comment
On the original
And one true karate kid

Anger with ambition
Is one thing but
Mindless anger
Without purpose
Is least I think
They took down
The ones
That called for my rape
I love the idea of a grand tour
It’s nostalgic when Non-Nazi
Germans and Austrians
In my experience
discuss Jews the way
Liberal White North Americans
discuss Blacks
Though that
Anxiety of influence
Stuff has legs

Sunday, August 01, 2010

God's Wrath and now I can't get **** from her

Julia Roberts struggles with masses of pizza
Oh for the glory days of Jack Bauer
Cut to the torture scenes or else zippiest firearm
In the toolkit does diddly in close-up melee lopez
Or fat ass Keira Knightley wants to yiff

In the wake of all that happened
Finding old tracks on you tube
Is the bollocks when the corn laws
Wake you up to the sound
Of some idiot
In a Chevelle doing donuts

Asian street meat as avant poetics
And we wondered where she got
Those firm wobbly plumpers

Meat bait you know that if it
Smells like funk then it must be us
Sex and the city girls
Are God's vagina

You need to set your
Little sexy ass down and watch yourself
Get killed

And I would smoke an old cigar
Then I would eat an entire large pizza
Off her dreads then I’d bind my wrists together
And jump up and down then I would tear
Open those fish nets and wrap them
Around some wet laundry and squeeze
Out all the dog poo yard dog red wine

I love a good bit of spnak me

Saturday, July 31, 2010

I Liked To Hear People Say 'Ouch

Accused gang member says
Only crime is baking cupcakes
Lesbian pajamas by Heather and Lori
Creates fabulous whimsical stains
The dramatic cupcake dog

Is having flashbacks from the war
On wedges and heels
With wooden soles really beautiful
Frosting fun Martha Stewart
Ponies pony pony in my pocket
I was so excited
When I found out she loved
Ugly crazy women porn

The axe swung today
Now don't misunderstand my gratitude
I would never ever spend more
The next thing to cut back on is labor cost
Just bought the J. Crew one on sale today
For ten forty nine so comfy

Desensitizing with masturbation
It sounds like you have reached
What they call in the rehab world
Being sick I'm glad they're adding
The don't care button

Don't you be sassin' me Frankenstein
Behold I am the ancient
Aztec God of bitch smacking
It's a pleasure to meet you
I know there is allot of trolls on here so
I'm sure this is like a god send to em

Some exaggeration and fake moaning
Lots of exaggeration and fake moaning
Recently I heard
On the radio they were talking
About saying why
Medical care costs were
Sure as a blog
Returns to its vomit
Your friends see it
Your stalkers see it
Your free lesbian babysitter sees it

Monday, July 26, 2010

It's One Of The Many Normal Human Emotions Or Moods

A dynamic post-secondary institution
Along with a brief explanation written by a professional astronomer
And academic relationships providing the guidance and investing the seed
And services for lawyers and for the public
Association specializing in public policy advocacy on business issues
Both undergraduate and graduate programmes are offered in many disciplines
Business licenses and recreation program registration city job applications and more
Cutting-edge science and tech
Editing as key in producing effective communications in the corporate
Evidence-based classroom program that has shown dramatic effect
Explanation of inflation target and market
Includes attractions history parks recreation taxes environmental programs transit
Includes footnoted script credits blog
Includes news on latest threats advisories planning tips and job opportunities
Institution committed to encouraging and fostering critical
Is a weekly general medical journal that publishes new medical research findings
Jet propulsion laboratory research affiliation
Largest protestant denomination
Membership dues from individuals who have joined to obtain such member benefits as nicely
Offers non-formal education to girls
Over sixty restaurants eight stages family activities free admission
Registered dietitians that provide resources for consumers
The exact spelling of a word
To die of fever
We have been very successful
With a lot of hoppin' swingin' fun

Sunday, July 25, 2010

Show Me Your Tits

I was only drawing attention
to the irony of trying to import western
Irony my friends say they think it's
Disgusting but I find it keeps me focused
On what I wear or how I fix my hair
Hey Cinderella show us your tits
Long dyed hair under a trucker's hat
Wannabe intellectuals
Think reading
Editing software at six feet and eleven inches a
New Jersey girl has been crowned Miley
In other words some women will like porn
At least as much as the average man
Issued the obligatory
It's not my fault mullet
And it is here to stay
Negative comments on this
And see how others
Rate your boobs
And the other two S Club 7 shows
Choosing porn that women like
Requires common sense and just
A bit of knowledge infecting cities
Towns and villages alike
But most of the time
They like unbearable shrill annoying dog shit
It only ever seems to be these sorts
Who are willing flash us with their delights
But don't listen to conservative pundits
Who would like to convince you otherwise
Is it normal for women to watch porn
What do you think
A few self-righteous friends and relatives
Will tell you that breastfeeding is best
Ever ask yourself whether something
In your life is normal or not
Come on now let down your guard
I just want to look and see
What you got for me
What you got for me show me
Show me your tits

Thursday, July 22, 2010

Spill Baby Spill

Chicks dig me
Because I rarely wear
Underwear and when I do
They are Sylvester Stallone
Philly cheese steak at Johnny Utah's
Where I ride the mechanical bull

Your penis name is Thrill Drill
It's not like you can go down to True-Value
And buy oil-rig cause we fucking
Founded this country asshole

So your wanna be attempt
To be a rebel
So chicks will dig you doesn't work
Chicks get thrills on boats named Wonder Bread
And Tiny
Cuz chicks dig brain damage
And dealing with psychological scars
A black Hummer complete with a
Drill baby Drill bumper sticker
Gets them more willing to initiate love-making

And either you support the troops or you don't
Skimmer boats worked for me as they gets me willing

And only ugly fat chicks dig guys in a Prius

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Avoid stigma of paying a publisher

Sometimes it is hard to order
A prescription for lithium
Over the phone
When other people are around
So do what I do
Refer to lithium
As the drug that starts with L
When the power of the clam
Is so intense that the sun shines
Out of your crotch heygrrl
Just wasted an hour of my life
Watching Jill a nice Jewish girl
Who is planning her wedding
Rose is a long-haired Latina
Who has problems
Hatched from a horrifying alien egg
Laid on cover of Rolling Stone
So I found myself on a couch
Spending too much time on youtube
Watching Buffy fanvids
With Lady Gaga songs
Roll out the welcome mat ladies
I wonder do you think Christopher Hitchens
Likes Stevie Nicks

Tuesday, July 20, 2010

George Steinbrenner left after pleasuring me in the bathroom

The annoying Facebook Girl
Queue Maury Povich
I'm such a loser for doing this
I thought the parking lot looked familiar
But I've only visited Santa Monica
Dear god you guys are such trolls
I'm like the Internet whore
I'm on the Internet way too much every day
Only because the most die-hard fans
Would do such a thing because you know
I don't care at all
so here we go
How come every time you come around

I'm actually a student at Millburn High School
And I would like to
Back off I'm a Corporate Whore
There's no such thing as a free lunch
there's only prostitution you buy
Was my dress a bit too see through
I'm such a carb whore
I'm happy with my choices
Why can't people just leave it alone?
Then we had the mommy is a whore talk
And the dirt cow makes my cock itchy

Friday, July 16, 2010

I'm your sexually explicit new neighbor

A message was left by Jennifer
An inquiry was made by Ella
An old buddy says "wasssup"
An old Schoolmate says hello
Ann lives just 10 blocks from you
Ann lives just 12 mins from you
Hey I'm only 10 mins from you
Hey I'm only 17 mins away
Hey I'm only 18 miles from you
Honey wants to hookup
Jenna has made a comment
Jessica is very intrigued by you
Michelle seems really interested in you
Sarah is attempting to contact you
Victoria seems really interested in you

Cancer is really interesting

Monday, July 12, 2010

Male and Girl. Pharmacy Shop

I try to emulate hip hop in terms
Of its syntax to the brim
With the sweetest nectar
Is annoying to my teenage daughter's
Mr. T look

I think you could rock it
I know I could here is the picture
That has become my wallpaper for emulating
Ron Paul's nervous laughter

What terrifies Bill Gates
A very loud and sharp wind
Almost like a hoarse scream and I thought
The Rocky Mountains would be a little rockier than this
Burnt out tweeters kissing girls on the school bus
'Cause they're hot for each other and not just for the camera

The old 99 bottles of beer on the wall
Certainly comes to mind while visiting this unusual
Tiny house in an older section of this sprawling southwestern
Path-breaking advances in the treatment of seizure disorders
Of Iowa which means he is toast
Slathered with butter
And a sprinkling of cinnamon sugar

Sunday, July 11, 2010

The Bollywood Stars When They Were Young Quiz

There are several homemade rat poison mixtures
That you can make absolutely top quality
Very helpful and a fully fitted out
Twitter in shakespeare's language side-by-side
With a translation
Into modern english
The kind of english people actually speak

I've been looking for a girl like you
Not you but a girl like
You if I were a girl
Not that smooth type of girl
Beautiful gifted a good-looking good-tempered
Well-dressed nitty gritty dirt band lyric
Wearing light-coloured trousers

The other man was wearing green combat trousers
A green shirt
Actually I read somewhere that wearing this kind of blue
And greens etc. will help impove the yoga sessions and
Click here for photographic evidence that should
Finally put to end all this chatter I was wearing really high heels
For prom and two days after my feet are still in pain
While they were in power

A more natural like globalization
A great preview of a new clip
Featuring my sexy soles
And perfect size 10 feet you can worship
And lick them
Stroke to them
Do whatever you do

Sunday, May 30, 2010

Rebel Analism: The Love Poem and The New Formalist

Rebel Analism: The Love Poem and The New Formalist

Ooooh Ooooh Yeaaaaaah Girl I've been watching you
From so far across the floor now baby
That's nothing new I've watched you age
With the typical aches and pains associated
With lovin ain't the same And you keep on ooh
Ooh ooh ooh ooh everybody

I see you on my radar you act like you ain't afraid of shit
You know I got it and if you wanna come on down
In history as a shoulda-been-great poet's
greatest achievement let's dance let's shout uh uh
Keep it goin yea whatever Flavor Flav sez
Now now now
Now this is that fly shit

The do or die shit
I`m not saying this happened exactly
Or even happened at all
But that`s the impression I got
I take it to mean that the couple
Were never meant for the
Til death do us part

Now I can't stop mo money
Mo murder mo Kelly Clarkson
Has some wild slutty fantasies
While performing her extremely poppy
New tune she so freaks me out
This is the worst thing
Since the ass rape of Ted Bundy
When he was still alive in death row
Except now it's ear rape

Thursday, March 18, 2010

I have to stay 500 feet away from miley cyrus' nipple

I have to stay 500 feet away from miley cyrus' nipple

The cameras may have stopped rolling
But that doesn't mean the drama
Was obtained by a simple algebraic manipulation
Of the original polynomial plush pets
Each come with a unique
Secret code designated trademarks and brands
Are the property of their respective owners
Not a linear sexting app that would
have saved Tiger Woods a lot of trouble
But the premier destination to watch
And share your original string of characters
A promise that you can't keep
Or else you'll wind up miserable
With a shaved head want to see more
Of what's going on in Oprah's world
The perfect date was a long time coming
Play as long as you like
We have over 8000 games in our arsenal
a weaker-than-expected forecast i have
To stay 500 feet away from inspirational
Performance assemblies and follow up
Artistic development workshops

Monday, March 08, 2010

I was looking around on Craigslist for a lamp that looked like Elvis when

I was looking around on Craigslist for a lamp that looked like Elvis when

We brought ourselves to believe
That Michael Jackson "liked" the Arab World
Because he drove his car through an
Adultmart store just to steal a sex-toy replica
Hunched over a typewriter management thinkers
And executives alike
Now realize that bosses cannot
Just give the monkey a substantial
Part of our career
This new health scare
Was the most shocking finale ever
And thrills fans by doing aerial stunts of anger
At the ''Men Tell All'' reunion
The bachelors vent their fairy-tale spleen
After enduring two seasons of reality dating
How come bloods and crips don't get along?
Until their pants are down at the fucking mall
Why do slugs shrivel up
When people pour salt on them
You get what you pay for

Thursday, March 04, 2010

you're on public transportation and someone has their music on their ipods or whatever turned up so loud that everyone can hear it

You're on public transportation and someone has their music on their ipods or whatever turned up so loud that everyone can hear it

This homage to our favorite online social network
And the Fail Whale appears whenever
The site is overloaded
When a low IQ from Norway
Drinks some shit for some money
An acquired and very specifically acquired
Taste of fat unwashed losers
Building what essentially boils down
To a cult to "redesign" hot dogs
And other foods that weren't dangerous
Enough perhaps there is a non-existent 100%
Hot theoretical tacky trannylicious
True romance like waffles
But really wants Salma Hayek's boobs
Cause you boys been wackin off to a dude
Cept she has a vagina and she better not
Disrespect his mamma In my experience
a dog may go for several days
before finally resorting to eating the owner's body
A cat on the other hand
will only wait a day or two

Monday, March 01, 2010

The Typing of the Ghosts

The Typing of the Ghosts

Today I wrecked the rental
I used a Sharpie
As an eye liner
In the airplane bathroom
I talked to my mom yesterday
Dad's not doing well
He's unsteady, dizzy, forgetful
A heart monitor found an arrhythmia
Na na na na hey hey I think I might
Go watch Napoleon Dynamite's dance scene
Now that it's always sunny in Philadelphia
If you want to be a cracker
Go read the alt.2600 newsgroup
And get all the dirt fit to print
Brad Pitt and Quentin Tarantino
Are teenagers from different worlds
They meet up at a karaoke contest
And fill their cargo pants up with weed
So appropriate meathead may result
In severe civil and criminal penalties
Unless prior authorization has been obtained
A cute new science teacher causes Dakota Fanning
To lose focus jeopardizing
Her father/daughter bonding weekend
It reminds me of Daffy Duck and
It bugs me that he got another round off
Life is so full of little annoyances
Sometimes they are a sophomore
Release by a progressive rock band
Where the supply of exotic is in the wake of
Viagra's enormous popularity
I'm feeling rough
I'm feeling raw
I'm in the prime of my life pushing stuffing
between the turkey's skin and breasts
Increasing the thickness of the breasts
So they take the same time to cook as I feel pain
About 2 inches above my hip bone
The size of your fist
In a tractor-trailer
part of Chuck Norris' sperm escapes
From a lavish, posh, ritzy, bewitching,
Exclusive, expensive, and elaborate little hymen

Friday, February 26, 2010

Onanism With The Kardashian

Onanism With The Kardashian

These blasted jugs weigh 40lbs
Dead weight and are too heavy
for most women my jugs are only
A hundred quotations of courage,
Persistence, happiness, the purpose of life,
And most famous for a series
Of phenomena involving a persistent
And invasive low-frequency noise
Not audible to all this is
How you will disappear
While I self medicate
Through the passing year
A cosmic disco floor-filler
That sets the stage for
The pipes aren't meant to hold semen
I just wonder what else is included
In the semen-related costs
At University of Michigan
By the way
Can a doctor tell
From a physical examination
If I makes little ladyboy squeals
when I masturbate with Khloe Kardashian
Apparently understands
The true meaning of Valentine's Day
Simply by positioning her hooch underneath
A roaring waterfall
And letting gravity handle the rest

Thursday, February 25, 2010

Please Don't Break My Heart Vinyl for just $2.97

Please Don't Break My Heart Vinyl for just $2.97

A good student
A track star
And a greaser to our events
Those we attend in the wider BDSM world
To fly the flag
It is important for one's mental
And physical health Mr Jaguar
And I still have not done the deed
Since Baby Jaguar was born
It's my fault entirely
It's my responsibility
Entirely my fault
Of course I regret it
It's the kind of locker-room conversation
We all use if my wife
Is in a bad mood
Anyone else get this
Paris you little Yorkie
Get your little tail back here
How do I re-boot
My computer so everything is gone
And why am I stalking
A hot Swedish woman named Ingrid
OK so I just started 11th grade
I got a vehicle and everything and I'm
Pretty sure that Gwen Stefani's
Face is boneless chicken slices

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

The Millionaire Milf Next Door

The Millionaire Milf Next Door

Really can't afford it myself so
That'll do it for this issue of Kickin' it Old School
with Microsoft Word 97 ... I'm sure
My friend scream in the woods
I realized immediately that it was very warm
And discovered to my horror
That the phone was dead to flag profiles
Of people on their friends list
who have felt dead doomed someday to
Become an online ghost town
Run by zombie users defacing accounts
Left logged on
Usually by changing the person's status
Dear Jess
Thank you so much for being my friend
And Hindi movie buddy
I wanted to know what your chemistry with Nimoy was like
Your fuck buddy in Lexington called before you came
And i need to shave my cha cha Rizzo
Retaliates and asked out a rival gang leader
A naughty soccer mom
And a dirty bored housewife

Saturday, February 20, 2010

Righting wrongs through penetration

Righting wrongs through penetration

Does anyone know where Art is these days
He was my very first mentor
Believe it or not
Twenty four hour shipping on most orders
Forgery and anthropology
While I watch the cannons flashing
I clean my gun and dream
I still hear your sea waves crashing
While I watch the cannons flashing
I still see her standing by the water
Standing there looking out to sea
And is she waiting there for me
Should I clean my gun
How often should I clean my gun
How safe is my gun without cleaning
A She-Ra, Jem, or Care Bear
Can just walk into a Walmart
And find them or am I going to
Throw a sonic boom and walk in behind
Bliss in unknown artless
Unknown Guile
Mood Magic the stuff of enchantment
A walk of worship
Woodland Sanctuary
Mood Magic like winged splinters
Briny kisses lick our wounds
A woman recovers a lost lottery ticket
From Deseret, a breakaway state
Several times proclaimed by Mormon rebels
And suppressed by US troops
This all sounds very creepy I know
But these are the good guys
And with inspirational speeches like
Keep your penis strong Little Red Riding-Hood
Pulled her hood over her curls
And set off down the sunny green slope
With her basket in her hand
At a brisk pace

Sunday, February 14, 2010

Fake Lugosi

Fake Lugosi

3 way evil pony
Vs the peppermint pony
From the rape of rainbows
Collection an endless supply

Easy to read and woefully
Written a so deeply constructed
Story of two girls and their heavenly
Intent for the human animal

Who became the third zombie
After being attacked by Vampira
And the fake Lugosi

It's a good thing they turned him into
Their signature infectious bouncy hooks
A fake octopus for Bela Bela
wasn't the butcher on Poverty Row

Making grade Z science after being abducted
And suffering years of Teletubbies
In their very own little slipcase
Gained notoriety early on
When a German teenager had purchased
Dozens of copies and used them
To construct a sort of altar in his room

Taking souls instead
Of saving souls
By Messenger
Of Elohim on MySpace
In this episode
The Rosary Army
Grew plants bearing fungus
That boned to
The human nervous system
Allowing them to control
The very words
They spoke under threat
Of spontaneous combustion

These collected remembrance
Are specifically about how we feel
as we remember our loved ones
The most often dished advice is by
Silliman's blog pop up's
Who always asks
How smart are you

Old school new school need
To learn though burn that mother down
When he got off of the Boat
In Galveston after
Just following these characters
Long enough to give us a serious sense
Of their lives
He stages what I guess is the
Fake Lugosi of the title

Thursday, February 04, 2010

Ron Paul's False Flag

Ron Paul's False Flag

I'm gonna have my head examin'
And find out the size
Of those beings that walked
The earth many millennia
Ago before the atmosphere
Underwent a dramatic
business proposal

For the Federal Reserve has
A number of incredible collaborations
between modern marvels
And living legends that
Secretly have man bits
That are fierce
And all thugged out

This girl named Sappho
Is in need the big cure of spanking
because she always shows her panties
in Amarillo Akron Albany anywhere
Lipstick lesbians say go Ron Paul go

He is the only candidate
who sounds just like
A founding father
Schooling and utterly
Pwning General Petraeus
and his ass far
far away from the
line of fire

This raises some serious
HR issues relating
To health care costs
Wellness recruiting
And employee relations

Just how sexy
Are Ron Paul-style
Republicans once they
Have made the long journey
From Casablanca to Buno

When he was a child
Ron Paul had speech
Impediments Ron Paul
Just Sounds like a tranny
Name and that is
The main problem
With his followers

Who say
That a Rockwell painting
Does not require an explanation
A caption or even a title

The time has come to take
Norman Rockwell seriously says
The New York Times
And the most over-rated doctor
In America isn't the dumb guy
From The Bachelor

Monday, February 01, 2010

The War On Drugs Makes The Baby Jesus™ Happy

The War On Drugs Makes The Baby Jesus™ Happy

You don't inspire poetry
You inspire quail
In a rosemary sauce
With a gossamer underpinning
Of asparagus

Dripping with garlic
Gossamer wings so
We've designed the patented
Always with Flexi-Wings
To flex

I remember when I lost my mind
There was something
So pleasant about that
Out in the lake
Seeing it swimming away
To the empty nights

This is just like The O.C.
the girlfriend continued
There's a giant house
bad acting
and inexplicable and unnecessary
plot twists

Calm the ache
stop the shakes
If you like the sound of
A blur I've tried to hide
This is proof
Of the Spaceship Jesus

From the stained glass windows
No Mom I'm not on drugs I'm okay
You see the streets
They'll shallow your chacha
With it's absorbency

Life suddenly becomes
Filled with flowers
And cute bunnies but
You've only got one
So for the ultimate care
Down there who
Needs to see a
NSFW Midol ad

Whatever semblance
of a tiny vagina
I was left with
nearly wrecked my car
when I saw this one

Dear Jesus please
make this idiot's anus

Saturday, January 30, 2010

Jabberjaw's Quetzalcoatl Quartet

Jabberjaw's Quetzalcoatl Quartet

Lately I have been plagued
By a very disturbing
Great white shark
(No relation) who is also
A drummer with The Neptunes
Whom I can't get out of my head

Even when they point
A gun even if they simply
Stand around like Jessica Fletcher
the sea witch in disguise
A very sexy mystery writer
Who lives in a small town
In Maine just take me
My lovely Quetzalcoatl

To the most barren desert
A few thousand miles
From the nearest sea
Take me back to Tulsa
I'm too young to marry
My mother is the Moon dark

Holding back
The wild hot sun
With shadows of
Serpent feathers
I almost died on
Three separate occasions

At the end of agriculture
At the end of the nobility cult
And at the end to the opening
Theme from the Andy Griffith Show

When Rosemary's billy-goat
Goes something like militant
Witchcraft punk
With a Motown edge

A great white shark
That speaks like Curly
From the Three Stooges
Nice life
Nice black-hole

Friday, January 29, 2010



Was a famous female French poet of the Renaissance
Daughter of Lyon who gave Cocteau
One million francs to make it here I can make it anywhere
On this list should have articles of their own
And should meet the Wikipedia notability guidelines
For their poetry books you can find thousands
And thousands of volumes waiting to be ordered
Mostly forgotten French poets
Some of which are English and Knowles Beyonce
Winning a Cesar for one million franc baby

When Clint Eastwood brings a small penis to Cannes or a
Famous scientist or the Dalai Lama tile box or
The French poet Baudelaire tile coaster
Cause if you liked it then you should have put a ring on it

I would have a chat with her cuz that's wrong
I think you should talk to her first
Its gross
Secondly weird
Ask her why is she even doin this?
I would let it be if she is making good money
Why not however it is kinda gross
Yes I think this is really gross and
You should tell her very nicely otherwise
She might get angry that your being "unfair"
To the militants that kill for Jessica Alba
My queen my goddess
and the hottest piece of ass we claim
There is not a one single name for Jessica
Or the Messiah see for yourself
A simple search of the Internet shows
War is a song that asks all the really obvious questions

The French public mocked Henri Rousseau's naive style
We just thought it was some sort of underdeveloped
Marxist theory on an truly awful way to die
An absolutely savage satire on the idiocy
Of calling pornography idiotic

Thursday, January 28, 2010

Pitchfork Penis

Pitchfork Penis

Wee Hitler Penis the happy puppy
Judges the ejaculation contest
Taking place across Lord Bowser
Perfectly rippled chest

Though the resonating torch
Had been carried forward
To die-hards only Hitler Penis held
The master ring to the eternal metal chord

Important information
About the vulva for
Dawn at the Eagles Nest
Where Little Hitler uses fingers
On a vagina for the first time
Transported through the portal
To where one is only bored silly
with the whole ghost ship blitzkrieg thing

Hitler's Penis knows the rejection the humiliation
Of wanting to play with us big kids
But with his little bike he can't lead the charge
On The Night Of The Fluffy Pink Kittens

Meandered and detoured
And wandered through melodic
Progressions so spaced out
He sounded almost like jazz
This definitely wasn't
Your Mothers' Hitler Penis

Lady Gaga came up first in a google search
For Hitler's Vagina in fact her vagina
Should be a motivational speaker
Advocating a particular style
Of personal grooming
When the female pubic region
Can resembles Ezra Pound's beloved Apis dorsata

Tiny Hitler Penis is so surprisingly beautiful
In it we get the austere beauty
Of a telecaster roaming
The western U.S it's a genuine representation
Of our romance with the despairing
Beauty of loneliness
A Hitler Penis of solitary confinement
In an expansive wide-open land

Thank you Hitler!
But our Princess is in another castle
The Order Of the Garter vol 3 - No Boys Allowed
Hitler kitty is so ready to pounce on your Poland

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Crypto-Zoology Shore

Crypto-Zoology Shore

Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 is the situation
Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 is a dystopian novel

Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 is a total jihad fugue
Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 is an all-volunteer effort
Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 is a mythological creature
Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 finally has the girl of his dreams

Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 in the classic mythological sense
Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 heard that a tiny part of you died
Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 is a gothic skull cross secret journal
Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 please and thank you if anyone can
Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 spent time just thinkin' thinkin' thinkin'
Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 caused aggression and alpha-dog issues

Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 is desperate to shows off her dumpy ass

Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 is adequate but adequate just isn't enough
Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 one of my most vivid childhood memories
Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 based on the 1972 novel by Brian Garfield
Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 as laden with paintings and other valuables
Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 from the folks who started it all snot puke pus

Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 is life as the girlfriend wife and eventual widow
Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 has said this all before your shadow's at the door
Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 are invisible transparent as glass going unnoticed
Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 wants to know where they can watch pervy anime
Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 suck out all of your cerebral matter out of your ass
Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 as a kind of playlist for this tremendous cleaning task
Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 have "gone wild" and those born and raised in the wild
Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 finds it impossible to avoid the apocalypse these days
Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 changes in sexual desire or ability constipation diarrhea
Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 is back to wage a huge war against hundreds of zombies
Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 is a holy war waged on behalf of Islam as a religious duty
Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 with the eminent emerson string quartet led me to slap down
Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 care a lot about disasters fires floods and killer bees we care
Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 stepped inside the enchanted world of butterflies and fairy stuff
Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 wishes you could lie to me and bring my baby back bring my baby
Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 is an American cartoon series that was produced in 1987 and 1988
Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 on their back with their feet in the air isn't doing it just to be weird
Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 subconsciously finds release in Alex just as it finds release in dreams
Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 is a quarter of a century after her untimely death the legend continues
Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 is a real crowd-pleaser filled with emotion drama action and suspense
Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 has no history books no photographs no knowledge no sorrow or regret
Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 for sale to bold thinking organizations and entrepreneurs who understand
Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 tells the story of a nine year investigation into more than $2.5 billion in gold
Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 is the missing spoils of war metal detecting dump diggers and scuba divers
Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 is scooping up as many franchises and rebooting as many them as possible
Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 has begun a crackdown on the wave of sub-Saharan Africans trying to reach Europe
Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 clumsiness dizziness slurred speech unsteadiness light-headedness and drowsiness
Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 right now is driving to Stockholm to leave their camera for service and cleaning at Nikon
Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 are the choice of champions and the choice of millions of darts players around the world
Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 was orphaned at the age of six when her parents were killed in an airplane crash overseas
Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 is a type of amusement ride consisting of an open seated gondola which swings back and forth
Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 am an energetic mother of two girls ages 2 and 5 I am offering 1 full time space in my in home daycare
Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 has desire for self-destruction often accompanied by feelings of depression hopelessness and self-reproach
Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 accepted the offer and decided to use it as a springboard to a show business career as a spectacular stunt
Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 as a font I thought it would be that cool writing from the cartoon series and it wasn't I didn't even know what the
Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 during the nineteenth century it was still widely believed in the West that Miss Spiritual Tramp of 1948 was a real creature

Sunday, January 24, 2010

It's a three-way melee that leaves Tokyo in tatters

Halle Berry wants to consider
What's most important to you
Halle Berry is teaching
Economics to young teenagers
I think you're right about education
And leadership proving that
Halle Berry is more important than you
Halle Berry does not wait in lines
She has an Oscar
And a People's Choice Award
Why file naming is more important
To Halle Berry than you think
Halle Berry was out of her mind when
She implied that the Obama health care bill
Was going to create death panels
Halle Berry is more like a raving maniac
Higher than a kite
Professing knowledge but locked in
A dead-eye game of one-ups-man-ship
with Glenn Beck for the crown of crazy
I think we were all surprised and disappointed
When Halle Berry's one hundred million dollar
Ode to the midwestern bank robbers
Of the 1930s rang false and was
Belittling instead of honoring in its sensitivity

Halle Berry's origin is not well known
She is the guardian of an ancient race
of tiny humanoids named the Cosmos
who lived on earth

The Wonder Twins first appeared
In the second season of Knots Landing
Like some kind of sex toy
But in fact took the form of a suit of armor
The Wonder Twins' didn't have kids before
Because their other husband
Was an alcoholic
The Wonder Twins have turned a new mix
Loose on the unsuspecting intertubes
The Wonder Twins serve as high priestesses
To Halle Berry a primitive deity
When ruthless show men kidnap The Wonder Twins
Halle Berry follows them to Japan

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Alfie Camus,The Witchfinder General

Ain't no fucking scenery to speak of here
But tat's right to my purpose
A man carrying a pistol at my back
There's the short walk to the front office
Clear out my desk
Gives a big smile
Grows wings and flies

So full of trash and rats
I felt one crawl across my soul
Fallen enemies are fed to the scavengers
Fallen friends are fed into the Great Furnace
Their souls returned to the Great Mother
While fallen warriors ready themselves

My lineage is Whitey McWhite
So a coat or two
Did the trick
Making my eyes pop
Without looking too weird or too dark
On those days I skip the elliptical trainer
Without a damn good reason
And find myself wandering through the woods

You come upon a sanctuary
A peaceful clearing that murmurs ancient secrets
The sounds of the waterfall beckon you to sit awhile
And contemplate how far you've come
And where your true path may lie
In this secret passage

And how the first angel blew his trumpet
Of hail and fire mixed with blood thrown
With blood will rain on
Blood fire and columns of smoke

Alphabetical a all and angel
Blood burned came down
Earth fire first car you see
Flame smoke smoke emitted from a vehicle
When it is on fire

We took your little white butt
and stretched it to the max

You continue your journey while the others
Attended “Kill Whitey” parties in Williamsburg

Sunday, January 17, 2010

Smurf-Flavoured Milkshake

And they're like
It's better than yours
Because she shakes her breasts
And it attracts males
Actually, i'm lactose-intolerant
No my blender is broken
I've been wearing skirts
Short skirts
For the last three days straight
Damn right it's better than yours
I can teach you
Also what is the "yard"?
Think about it
Milkshakes are when MySpace profiles
Bring all the boys to the yard as I started
Making my own nut milk when I was living in LA

The other fly ladies are smooth and creamy cuz Kelly Osbourne
Left embarrassed after dad Ozzy farted in their yoga class
Shake it all the time (Whoa)
All the time work, work, work
Be a cold day in hell before we screwed around with a real one
The last time I saw him
he was dead drunk
Leavin' in a box car
which is a more violent and dangerous form of Smurf dancing

Hmmm looks like the puffins dodos and boobies know
if you melt Smurf they turn to flarf
but how much flarf?
Flarf Smurf runs through the village and surrounding forest
with a quill in one hand and parchment in the other
looking for inspiration

One night when the moon was blue,
a stork brought Conceptual Smurf to the village
No one knows where he came from but he was
Immediately adopted by all the Smurfs
He completely changed their quiet little lives
But no one's complaining

Everyone loves Conceptual Smurf
with all his good and his bad

Thursday, January 14, 2010

Aleister Crowley underoos

Walking around

In his underoos made of four numerical it's free to view

Full screen streaming Saskatchewan

Towards the why I love sleep with a major change appearing right

At the end rather wear only clingfilm or eat

A plump chubby teenager sock

Commando side story most up-to-date Nanaimo weather forecast

Including Nanaimo's long range dumbbells will not allow for weaker muscle

A star if you love weather and the average Jane into a sexy vixen

Can crunch until you're blue in the then come long range

Irish long range with silver in the happiest marriages

The influence of my long-range airborne webcam

Showing off the beauty of the female foot

In this weather you need Aleister Crowley break time reading

When shown images chill I didn't expect her to be you

Hello there I am Andrea or &rea and information about Corfu's climate

Got me to do this gym class

Her spine straightening what words to use

a member of the most holy inquisition is weather Facebook Google they'll all be there

Prediction models of the end and a few other humans

For the long range period convicted serial killer

You icon of evil trade winds

Accurate seasonal forecasts patty cake manga

Doing military presses to shriek responsibility

Every man and every woman is extreme weather

A lean midsection is enough to turn a million dollars in this

Very latex hair Extreme Feet

The best foot fetish site on the fortune cookie

Factories of the northern plains

There is also hot she-males or hard stud gays

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About Me

Alana Madison is a serial killer, imposter and compulsive liar. Her online criminal work has ranged from Bellingham, where she started as a strangler, to Hillside, where she committed the 1979 murder of two females. She is currently a contributing prisoner of Walla Walla at Washington State Penintentiary, commiting the 1980 Compton perjury. Recent writing projects include Carmen Colon (Churchville, 1971), Wanda Walkowicz, Michelle Maenza, and Impersonation (a performance poem in LAPD).


beautiful corpse